Whether it’s threatening to move on from a partner who doesn’t treat you well or asserting that accruing money is the best way to get back at haters, music has shown us time and time again that revenge is more about uplifting yourself than harming the other person. When Kim Petras became the youngest person ever to receive gender-confirmation surgery, she declared bodily autonomy in a world intent on enacting violence against trans people. Now, as a talented singer whose amassed more than 17 million streams on Spotify, Petras is getting revenge through success. In this BitchTape, she lists her favorite songs about the dish best served cold.
1. Kelly Clarkson, “Since U Been Gone”
This song is for when you realize you have everything you need without the person that hurt you! Definitely got me over a ton of break ups. I’m so moving on.
2. Beyoncé, “Formation”
The best revenge is a sick music video.
3. Justin Timberlake, “Cry Me A River”
They can kick, scream, and cry as much as they want, but you have to realize you just don’t care anymore and focus on yourself. (Sorry Britney Spears, I love you the most!)
4. Queen, “Don’t Stop Me Now”
Go ahead and try. Nobody could ever say it better than Freddie Mercury: You’re unstoppable!
5. Blondie, “One Way Or Another”
Hide your wife, hide your kids…
6. Destiny’s Child, “Survivor”
Revenge looks best in a camouflage outfit.
7. Gwen Stefani, “Hollaback Girl”
Gwen Stefani is the the OG queen of clapbacks! She never took shit from anyone, which is a great skill to learn. Don’t hollaback, clapback.
8. Alanis Morissette, “You Oughta Know”
“You Oughta Know” is the pinnacle, the ultimate revenge song. It’s so raw and real! This is what getting cheated on actually feels like. It’s one of my favorite performances of all time.
9. Cyndi Lauper, “Girls Just Want to Have Fun”
They just hate when you’re having fun without them, don’t they? Actually, having fun and realizing you are all you need is the ultimate revenge. Karma will take care of the rest!
10. Bobby McFerrin, “Don’t Worry Be Happy”
Because too much revenge is bad for your complexion.