The Body Electric: Dear Bigots, Stop Having Children (A Rant)

Thomas Page McBee
View profile »


 Dear Bigot Parents:

Note that I won't call you "intolerant" because I don't think it's about "tolerance." Nobody needs to be tolerated. What needs to happen is you need to get your heads out of your asses and appreciate the rich diversity of life that exists around you. I know you don't like rich diversity, and whatever dumb reason you have to justify that--the bible tells you so (though, of course, it doesn't), your "right" to your own "beliefs," your "values," whatever--the claws really come out when there is a threat to your right to brainwash your babies into bigotry, too. I know, I know--your children must be protected! Here's the deal: your ignorance is not an excuse for the violence it causes. And I've had it with your bullshit. Your children must be protected, you're right--God save them from you.

So, what am I so pissed off about it? I mean, beyond the likelihood that you are the same people hell bent on preventing me from enjoying equal civil rights under the law in my partnership to the woman I have been with for five years? What's really got me mad is your reaction to the efforts of Frameline and the Gay Straight Alliance to do something that will likely save the lives and hearts of many (your own child, perhaps, among them).

Frameline and the Gay Straight Alliance have recently lauched a collaborative project called Youth in Motion-- which offers free educational videos to schools throughout California designed to educate young people about queer issues (including the spectrum of genders that is an obvious aspect of daily life, though I do understand that the head-in-the-ass perspective is limiting for you). 250 schools have already signed up, and you can check out the curriculum (which includes discussion questions like "What happens to people who don't conform to society's expectations with regard to gender and sexuality? What are they called? How are they treated?") on their website. The videos include an examination of the Native American Two Spirit people, an animated short about a boy finding the courage to wear a bikini and be himself, a father's poignant story of accepting his transgender daughter, and a story of a tomboy who goes on to become a basketball star.


(If you want a primer on the argument against showing these videos in school, check out this obnoxious article that justifies the homophobia pretty latently here but for the blatant stuff, go ahead and check out this conservative advocacy group's campaign).

I find you offensive. I think your "right" to pull your child from the classroom during the showing of these videos is a travesty, and your objections to the video being shown at all makes you an accomplice to hate. You know whose rights I'm thinking about? I'm thinking about Lawrence King, the gay eighth grader from Oxnard (in this great state of California, by the way) who was shot dead by a classmate in February. A recent New York Times article quoted Masen Davis, executive director of the Transgender Law Center, as noting that the fourteen-year-old shooter "is just as much a victim as Lawrence. He's a victim of homophobia and hate.'"

Whose homophobia and hate, you ask? Why, yours!

How about this? If you don't like the world you live in and if you insist on your right to be toxic, move out to the middle of nowhere with a bunch of other yahoos. You can sit around all day, bathing in your homogenous, hateful righteousness. Just keep yourself away from the general public--and quit reproducing. The next generation will be so much better for it.

Yours sincerely,

Page McBee

Get Bitch Media's top 9 reads of the week delivered to your inbox every Saturday morning! Sign up for the Weekly Reader:

9 Comments Have Been Posted


Part of me is surprised that these parents haven't yet won the Douchebag Decree (at least not in my recent memory).

I guess I can't sympathize with the worry these parents express due to my own childhood. My first memory of hearing about "other" sexualities and genders was when I was 5-7 years old and sitting in the car with my mother. Somehow the subject of gay marriage came up and I asked her how she felt about it. She said she supported it, and when I asked her why she told me it was "because if we don't let these people marry, then people like your father and I might not be able to marry either." This is clearly a simplified and incomplete statement, but it was comprehensible to my interracial child-self, so I responded with an "ok" and redirected my attention towards ToysRUs and Dr. Seuss.

Now somehow, miraculously, after this obscene and uncalled for discussion of homosexuality, I, an innocent child, did not fall into confused despair, nor did I turn into a lesbian. Imagine that.

A non-bigoted parent agrees

I specifically cringe when hearing about parents that must "pull" their children from the classroom for anything. CLASSROOM, place of learning, critical thinking and discussion. Why else let your precious chicks out into the world? It's sad that these people are terrified of having any real conversations with their children. God help these sheltered babies when they enter the world as adults and find the cookie-cutter images aren't really there!

Hey, don't send them to the

Hey, don't send them to the middle of nowhere! We don't want them here either. Send them to the moon or something.

ignorance begets ingnorance

At some point in time, a large group of Americans just quit evolving. I cannot understand why some people think it is just fine to generalize their hate to encompass portions of society that they do not know, and what's worse that they do not care to know. They are blinded by hate, misled by ignorance, and a cancer to posterity.

I applaud your "rant" (as you call it). It's honest, clear, concise and most importantly, THE TRUTH! After all, if the truth hurts, that should be the first sign that it's time to change.

How about suicide

I don't have the numbers with me, but what about the rates of suicide among differently gendered children? Do these asshats consider that their own child may take his or her life because of parental bigotry? And there needs to be a island for them. With Faux News pumped in 24/7.

California, then the world!

I think this is just a pilot program - I'm pretty sure Frameline & the GSA folks are planning to expand nationwide if they get enough financial support. I think it's a pretty awesome program, and I just donated some of my hard-earned bucks:

It'd be great if we can spread the LGBT film love around the country!

As a high school teacher who

As a high school teacher who had to try three times in seven years to get her school's GSA started, I loved reading this rant. I wish I could post this at work and insert it in all mailers that go home to the parents. The "ok" to start our club finally came when I coached two girls on the legal reasons why they could not be denied a GSA. What about just letting the kids start one for the good it would do? The most insulting concern administration had was that it would become a "dating service." That old assumption that straight people are choosey in who they are attracted to but LGBTQ people are attracted to everyone! They try so hard to keep us invisible, it is just sad. I would love it if that video was available here in New Jersey.

Yes, well

I dont know how far gay acceptence goes for you Americans. Apparantly, here in Canada we're supposed to be pretty liberated about it, cause we let them wed. I dont know, maybe it's just because I live in central Alberta (majorily white, christian farmers in small towns) but there is NO WAY this curriculum would ever pass in my high school, sadly enough. I've seen the bikini video too, on Movieola, a short film channel, but thats besides the point. I live in the only province in Canada that passed Bill 44, which is a law that allows parents to remove students from class when religion, sexuality, or race is being discussed. It doesnt actually go into motion until 2010, but I am dreading the time. How will Social or English classes even function? Fried Green Tomatoes, The Holocaust, Romeo and Juliet, Blood Diamonds??? The only safe subject will be math...but, no, I'm STILL going besides the point!
What i REALLY mean to say, is that everybody has the right to this information and all the different perspectives on different people coexisting in society. It's a part of life. Maybe not yours, personally, but somebodies, and it's good to be aware, and have the facts, and an open mind, and heart of these lifestyles even if you do not participate in them. It's not a crime or drug lifestyle, god sakes, it's affection, love, lust, and emotions. It's not harmful. Hearing that you can accept these people- because they ARE people- will not turn an entire school into sex-crazed transvestites.

Tolerance vs. acceptance.

I completely agree, and I truly believe that children even as young as elementary school should be taught more humanities classes to learn about the diversity in our country, both sex-related and otherwise. They implement bs anti-bully programs promoting tolerance but never teach children about the culture behind they've been taught to hate, or how to empathize with others. When you have 10 year olds committing suicide in our country for being called gay relentlessly and often times beaten for it-then clearly we have a real problem with our countries acceptance of gender and sexuality, and it's disgusting.
No parent- no matter how ill-informed and ignorant should be allowed to promote that kind of hate. Maybe the parents should be forced to watch a video- or for that matter read a book about gender (the many shades of grey in between male and female, sexuality, acceptance). -though it would likely do no good as we are surrounded by neanderthals who cling to their faith as an excuse to hate out of fear despite any logical reasoning to the contrary.
Nothing against faith- but when it gets in the way of logic AND basic human decency something must be done.

Add new comment