Douchebag Decree: Don't Apologize for Your Metabolism, Lady. No, Really. It's Cool.

woman holding a sign reading "I'm Sorry the Butt I Work For Isn't As Good as the One You Ate For"

Britton Delizia, Las Vegas resident and gym enthusiast, lives in a really interesting, special world. It’s a world where fat people are not only tolerated, but glorified and held up as an ideal to which all women must aspire. High-fashion magazines are filled with size-22 models, for whom Karl Lagerfeld and Miuccia Prada clamor to make the finest clothes. Thin, fit women are shunned on the street, sandwiches hurled at their Lululemon-clad figures. And man, you don’t want to know what happens when a woman with a finely honed six-pack walks into a spinning class at the gym. The stares, the whispers—it’s hell.

Yes, this is Britton Delizia’s world, and she feels that you should know that it’s a dangerous, dangerous place. To wit:  

Its undeniable that when we stand a skinny, athletic or even average sized female next to a larger (even if less healthy, overweight or obese) female, that…we as Americans will assume that the heavier person is funnier, smarter, nicer, and less sexually promiscuous, all because she is not as thin or physically fit than the girl next to her.

This thing has already taken a life of its own , the insurgence of women who feel they have been put into box where they are allowed to be attacked but are not allowed to defend themselves, where they can be mocked and assaulted for having an ideal size, or for working on their body , but where the inverse is a protected category of people who if you were to repeat to them the inverse ( Girl you look like you need a sandwich VS You should skip a meal) you could be fired , assaulted, or arrested for a hate crime.

So…wait, what?

Yes, that’s right. Britton Delizia is mad as hell about how thin, fit, well-formed women’s bodies are treated in society. And to combat it, she’s using Kickstarter to fund and create a book of photos of thin, fit, well-formed women’s bodies. What would differentiate said book, from, say, 90 percent of books or magazines consisting of photos of women? Well, this one has a purpose: To raise awareness of this cultural discrimination, and to once and for all MAKE IT STOP. The curiously punctuated book I’m Learning to apologise for my Metabolism is going to be a game-changer, y’all.

Here’s the thing about Britton Delizia, for those of you who perhaps feel that while, yeah, this is a dopey project, and SOMEONE should learn the definition of “bastardize,” calling this person a douchebag is way harsh, Tai. It’s not at all douchey to propose that discrimination and trash talk about women’s bodies is something that sorely needs to end. It’s not douchey to suggest that this trash talk perpetuates the idea that women must necessarily be in competition with other women for societal approval, male attention, and other dubious cash and prizes. And it’s definitely not douchey to believe that the very fact that we consider women’s bodies—all bodies, really, but women’s especially—to be in the public domain, just waiting to be assessed and judged and declared “beach-ready” or “cankle-y” or any other of a thousand adjectives coined solely to apply to women’s physiques, is a problem that is worth fighting.

However. What is douchey is creating the kind of antagonism that Delizia has created with this project, which conflates the quotidian cattiness aimed at thin, beautiful women—a cattiness that is a direct result of the belief that women’s bodies are always in competition with one another!—with the actual discrimination faced by fat people.

And while Delizia claims that the project’s aim is not “to bash or assault any single body type, quite the opposite,” the photo on her Kickstarter page—of a woman holding a sign reading “I’m sorry the butt I work for isn’t as good as the one you ate for”—tells a very different story. For Delizia, weight is a binary. And people are never so quick to feel judged as when they themselves fail to practice nuanced thinking.

The excellent Lesley Kinzel, writing at xoJane, summed up the fear that undergirds this project—the idea that suddenly, fat people are more visible and less apologetic than perhaps they’ve been in the past:

“She might be thinking, wow, suddenly there’s fat people EVERYWHERE, and they’re not all actively hating themselves. They’re living their lives! Being seen in public! Not hiding themselves in muumuus and basements, only venturing out in darkest night to replenish their stockpiles of bacon and lard, diving back into their hiding spaces like waddling flabbified vampires returning to their grease-stained lairs at the sunrise. They’re acting like people. Like they have a right to human dignity! THIS CANNOT BE ALLOWED TO STAND!”

And certainly that’s part of it. But Delizia’s writing evinces a real disconnect from reality that is both puzzling and, let’s face it, just a tiny bit hilarious. Take this earnest plea to think of the children:

I think this book will probably upset a few people, i think it will be looked at wrong by some people.

But.. if it just makes it into the hands of ONE little girl who feels like she has to be overweight to fit in with the current 70% of the overweight population of America, and it gives her the strength to know that being healthy isnt a bad thing.

Yes, please! Free the little girls from the tyranny of magazines like Fat Seventeen and Your YM Fat Prom, with their brainwashing photos of girls Photoshopped to look 40 pounds heavier! Free them from the damaging influence of unrealistically fleshy Barbie and her glitter-festooned pink muumuus! Stop making girls think it’s cool to be fat, American culture!

The point isn’t that Britton Delizia is a terrible person with a fiendish vendetta against fat people. I mean, she might be, but the point is that she, like almost all of us, has internalized years of insecurity and misery and perspective-warping cultural chatter about weight and well-being, and is processing it in the form of perceived discrimination, just as others process it via eating disorders or, in the case of Ricky Gervais, cruel self-hating humor. She’s free to do that, though it remains to be seen how many people care to actually fund her project. (After all, an issue of Women’s Health or Shape magazine pretty much gets the same job done, and is readily available on most newsstands.)

However bizarro the world Delizia claims to live in may seem, it’s ultimately not unlike the world that the rest of us live in, in one crucial way: It’s a world where women’s bodies stand in for their entire beings, and, however thin or heavy they are, bear an unfair weight of judgment and expectation.

by Andi Zeisler
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Andi Zeisler is the cofounder of Bitch Media and the author of We Were Feminists Once: From Riot Grrrl to CoverGirl®, the Buying and Selling of a Political Movement. You can find her on Twitter.

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34 Comments Have Been Posted

I love this (in her bio): "No

I love this (in her bio): "No child should be taught that being healthy , or active, or pretty , means your dirty, or dumb."

Maybe not, but you don't know the difference between your and you're, and that's a little sad. But beyond that, really, who teaches their children that?

I think her book is a passive

I think her book is a passive aggressive response to those "thin privilege" or "fat acceptance" blogs. While I don't agree with the method, I'm glad someone on this planet is promoting a healthy idea, rather than trying to convince people that the laws of conversation don't apply when it comes to chocolate cake, or that being obese and at risk for cardiac arrest is considered remotely healthy.

This isn't a book about boob jobs, liposuction, or airbrushing. It's photos of real women who partake in real healthy habits and real exercise, with real results. At least it isn't hurting anyone, is my take.

But she has a boob job.

But she has a boob job.

Fat acceptance blogs do not

Fat acceptance blogs do not promote the concept that "being obese and at risk for cardiac arrest is considered remotely healthy," they promote the concept that a person's health is the concern of only that individual person (and maybe that person's doctor).

The concept behind this book is not ground-breaking or marginalized or unheard of in any way. We see this message EVERYWHERE—in magazines, television shows, movies, etc. Thin and active people are not a marginalized group—they are celebrated as the image of health despite the fact that health is completely subjective and personal. The bottom line is that this woman is trying to lash out against the idea of thin privilege because it makes her feel shitty. You know what makes people feel shitty? Being demonized for their weight, whether they're thin or fat.

What Fat Blogs Actually Say

Miranda is on the ball here!

The Fat Nutritionist wrote a great article on this topic the other day, aptly called "Stuff people assume I believe vs stuff I am often accused of believing". Here's the part that I think is most relevant to the absurd assumption presented above by anonymous:

"[E]ven though research shows that there are health risks with being fat, especially extremely fat, the research also seems to indicate that 1) we don’t know for certain whether all those risks are caused by a direct physiological mechanism of adipose tissue, 2) that trying to lose weight does not work permanently for most people, 3) even if it did work permanently, we still do not know whether a formerly-fat person would enjoy the same lowered risk as a naturally-thin person, and 4) that “obese” people with good health habits have less risk, even though they are still fat.

Also, having a condition that means you have more health risks doesn’t make you a bad person or an intolerable burden on society. Lots of different categories of people have elevated health risks (like men), but we don’t stigmatize them in the same devastating ways we do fat people."


I get the point of this, I really do. I don't think ANY body should be criticized... But people are slammed for their goals. Especially on fb. Most of it based off insecurity. I'm sorry but the people posting stupid UNlol catz and memes want to make fun of someone with goals? Okay. Have funding that, sorry I work out for an hour vs spending 14 on YouTube. I think everyone should just stfu and do your own thing and quit being so insecure. Yes, some people take it a lil too far, but it's the Internet.ive seen worse.

I am just not quite sure what

I am just not quite sure what world this woman lives in. Are there really women out there who believe this? We shouldn't be teaching children anything other than how to take care of their bodies so that they can live healthy, happy lives in the bodies they have. Not because their bodies will be more desirable, obviously making them more desirable human beings in general, if they are fit and toned and thin!

While her project is

While her project is misguided and unnecessary, that doesn't mean that she hasn't suffered insults. If she was fat and doing the same project you wouldn't be calling her a douchbag. Let's stop hating on bodies of all sizes.

That is the point of the

That is the point of the piece though - to call her out for being judgemental about other women's sizes. The article doesn't mention anything about her size or health.

Right, and the point here is

Right, and the point here is that she's conflating being insulted with being discriminated against. If her snarky friend told her to eat a sandwich that is as mean as it would be if the friend of a fat person told them to eat a salad. That is more about women picking at each other, which arguably is part of the way sexism wriggles its way into our everyday lives, sure. But, it isn't fat people discrimating against thin people. To my knowledge, the surgeon general has not yet gotten up and declared a war on fitness or killer abs. So arguably, this skinny oppression thing just doesn't exist. She's co-opted the discourse of oppression to fight for the favored class. The thing that makes me cringe about how much attention this is getting, though, is that I worry she isn't an example of anything. She's maybe just kind of a dumbass.

This: "She might be thinking,

This: "She might be thinking, wow, suddenly there’s fat people EVERYWHERE, and they’re not all actively hating themselves."

Lately, many conservative people I know have been expressing sentiments like, "Why are we all being so divisive these days? We need to remember that we are all Americans. People need to just stop complaining and playing identity politics." What they aren't getting is that some people have always been oppressed, denied their rights, or labelled as "lesser" in our culture - it's just that nowadays their voices are beginning to reach your bubble of privilege. Stop asking them to shut up just to make you comfortable.

So, as a thin woman who works hard to stay thin, I'm happy to hear my fat friends finally beginning to find their own voices. If we can't handle hearing it, maybe the problem is us.


There is definitely a stereotype about women who exercise just wanting to be skinny and she is at least saying that not every woman hitting the gym is about that. I think her anger might be misdirected but I could understand where it comes from.

Actually, as she makes clear

Actually, as she makes clear in that sample photo, her BUTT is what she's hitting the gym for. Not sure how you're getting the idea she's arguing against a stereotype here.

To be honest I find nothing

To be honest I find nothing wrong with her picture and comment that she is holding in her hands. I work out on a daily basis, why? because I feel good about my body, I feel physically stronger and I have more energy. We have commentators pointing out she has a boob job, or that she is clearly focusing on her butt. So what is the problem, as women don't we all have the right to do whatever we choose to our bodies. I do feel sometimes there is this prejudice against women who workout; that we are shallow or we care about what others think. I have been told many times by my friends jokingly that I need to eat a sandwich or they call me a skinny bitch. But they would shutter at the idea of me calling them a fat bitch. Why is that? Why is it more accepted in society to talk about women who are skinny and it is such a taboo to speak about a woman who are over weight. Not all skinny women are unhealthy and starving themselves, just like all curvy women aren't eating whole pies while sitting on the couch. I find in this day in age, as women we are fighting to accept our curves, but that acceptance goes out the window if you try too hard to look good. I have only one body in this life and I want to keep it as physically healthy as long as possible.

Not all skinny women are unhealthy and starving themselves

I think this is what is really the point. If fat acceptance is about the idea that people's health is a matter between them and their doctors, THAT APPLIES TO SKINNY PEOPLE TOO. We ALL get the right not to be told what to eat by well-meaning friends, acquaintances, complete strangers.


As a "skinny chick" I feel the consequences of this article... I am a post-anorexic (for reasons entirely other than cultural/societal standards, thanx, I'll never let go of the grief from which I took to sorrow) who still maintains a skinny body, but I have no problem with fat people, nor fat-acceptance movements. I have my own personal reasons for desiring thinness, and I understand my own skinniness presents as many health problems as being "fat" might. But I feel neither repulsion nor disapproval at other "fat" bodies - indeed, at this moment I have a crush on a "chubby" girl... I feel as much insecurity as I might were I to weigh more, 'cause that's how crushes go. But I'm only considering such factors due to this sort of article... otherwise, why should any woman or any female... or male or man... or PERSON even pay attention to the false standards established by a monolithis standard whih make no sense experientiallty? There are so many causes with which one can improve human happiness besides the criticism of the body.

Was anyone else getting a

Was anyone else getting a serious MRA/ war on Christmas/ white racism vibe with this "skinny people are being discriminated against" gal?

In a world where millions of

In a world where millions of people go to bed hungry, should we be just a little offended or shocked that one of the leading medical issues in the states is over-eating? I understand a want not to be attacked for being fat, but fat acceptance often lapses into a form of hefty-idealism that often asserts itself by claiming that its inverse (i.e. more slender people) are unhealthy, weight obsessed, or disordered.

I was in the store yesterday, looking at a few shirts, when a morbidly obese man next to me picked up a shirt and remarked that it was made for anorexics. I didn't say anything although I could have fit in the shirt, and was effectively called disordered. If I picked up an XXXL and said "What pathologically overweight person would this fit?" it would have been grossly inappropriate by social standards. I think that's her point. That a grossly overweight person may call someone who is reasonably healthy (I exercise, make an effort to eat healthy, but am not pathological about it) disordered without seeming out of place while the inverse would be met with outrage.

We're didactic in society about loads of choices; smokers and drinkers are acceptably taxed and discouraged. Overeating has a social cost as well (though perhaps not as acute). Im not saying we should have a fat tax, but I do think people should be encouraged (not coerced like drinkers and smokers) to eat an amount of food that will lead them to a healthier size.

"If I picked up an XXXL and

"If I picked up an XXXL and said "What pathologically overweight person would this fit?"
You know, that's really fucked up what that "morbidly obese" (thanks for the value-free and not at all fat-shaming language, btw,) man said to you. You know what's more fucked up? That you cite this one unfortunate incident as 'proof' of and imply with your little anecdote that 1. thin people are oppressed by fat people, 2. most of our culture deems fat-shaming "grossly inappropriate". I'm not going to ask what planet you inhabit because I know exactly where you come from. These assumptions are the result of your privilege as a thin woman. Since you like anecdote, here's one for you. I am plus sized and, if I don't shop at exclusively plus-sized stores (kinda hard to do in a rural area, you know?), then I am fat-shamed ALL THE TIME: at my job, while eating in public, while grocery shopping, while clothes shopping, while, you know, walking down the street. Stares from people in women's and juniors, giggles from teenaged girls and boys, and I have on several, several occasions had a thin person walk past me, stare me up and down, and ask where the 'regular' sized clothes are or remark that they are in the 'fat' section. I've had people yell and throw things out car windows at me for being fat. Fat people exist in public with constant harassment unless they segregate themselves, and you're suggesting that not only do fat people not face this and thin women do, but that fat women themselves are participating in the oppression of thin women? Jesus Christ, I cannot twist my brain around the contortions of logic required to arrive at your comment.

Overeating is not just a personal choice with a social cost. Have you noticed that the most obese areas correlate exactly with the highest rates of poverty, the least educated, the fewest resources, and the lowest standards of living? I grew up in and still inhabit one of the top 3 states in poverty, lowest levels of education, lowest standards of living, and obesity, and, you know what? I grew up poor without access to fresh vegetables and fruit or 'low-fat' products. I grew up in an environment which--economically and culturally--weighed heavily in favor of my becoming overweight. I learned to eat quick, cheap meals prepared or left by a working single mother on welfare. I have since learned to cook, and to cook well, but I still make only enough money to sit me right around the poverty line and, so, I eat more junk than I should. I struggle constantly with my weight and the pressure I feel every fucking where I go. I don't have time to explain why examining people's choices in separation from their environments, or as if they exist in a vacuum, is problematic and, well, wrong. Seriously, fuck you for reducing something as complex as the life of a fat woman to 'personal responsibility.'

I'm sorry I have to somewhat

I'm sorry I have to somewhat disagree with how offended you are becoming over this woman's opinion. I have grown up in poverty as well, in fact I got laid off this year, I have a nine year old son and I am a full time student. Money is scarce and I have to penny pinch every dollar I have, BUT I make it work to eat healthy and take care of myself. Unfortunately I can't afford to eat organic and go on some health food craze. I do ALL my l produce shopping at the 99 cent store, and for anyone who want to talk about how it is low quality produce, I'd like to rebuttle that so is cheap fast food.

I will give you one thing though, if people aren't taught proper nutrition and how to take care of themselves physically, then how do we expect them to do these things on their own.

My next question is, what is wrong calling the man morbidly obese if he was? What would you use to so eloquently define a person who is severely overweight.

It is sad when we can no longer be truly open and honest, and have to sugar coat every god damn thing we say or think because people are so sensitive.

You are an adult, I'm sorry for the way you grew up but there is worlds of information on the world wide web and a lot of programs out there. Not to make everyone SKINNY but to live a healthy lifestyle that doesn't make a person so angry.

Not every poverty is equal.

Not every poverty is equal. Did you ever hear of "food deserts"--vast areas where people have a lack of access to fresh produce? Or how shaming fat and unhealthy people for their "life choices" often amounts to classism? Because people in poverty are more likely to eat unhealthy meals (because it is cheap, because it is easy to prepare, because of a lack of education on how to do things different, because of a lack of better options)? Because POC and queer people are more likely to drink and smoke (because these things are used as self-therapy)? This society has a burgeoning "health and fitness" industry that only few can afford, one that is conflated with this country's often-noxious bootstraps philosophy. In addition, Americans overall focus less on preventive medicine and more on medication and surgery. If we didn't, we would've realized that eating most animal products can be pretty fucking bad for us. But no, because the animal products industry in this country is too damn big, because we've been educated into thinking that dairy and meat are essential to life, because our eating infrastructure is so dependent on it, because doctors need patients... yes, let's blame individuals with little power for their "choices" and give the larger forces at work here a pass.


Where in the world did you get the idea that "eating most animal products is...bad for us?"

I eat lean meats, eggs, cheese, fruits & veggies, nuts, greek yogurt and am very healthy at 40. If anything, the junky processed foods with hundreds of chemicals, only 15% of which have been officially APPROVED by the FDA to use in our country's food, are what is sending this country into an unhealthy tailspin.

People DO need to take responsibility for themselves and for their health. Unfortunately it's become way too common to take the easy way out in our society.

Instead of listing 100 excuses as to why something isn't possible, try taking that energy and turning it into a solution.

It is sad when we can no

<blockquote>It is sad when we can no longer be truly open and honest, and have to sugar coat every god damn thing we say or think because people are so sensitive. </blockquote>

I like how the idea of being empathetic is now sooooo sad and mean! God forbid you would think "Hey, I don't like it when people judge me for having the [thin] body I work for, so maybe I shouldn't judge other peoples' bodies."

Naw, that's just suger-coating and not tell people how it really is! "Someone told me to go eat a sandwich once, so I think that totally makes it ok for me to judge fat people and their inability to use BOOTSTRAPS!"

Why does the eating habits of someone else bother you? Why should you care? It's no one else's damn business that you have the body you have, so why the hell is it ok for you to tell someone they're doin' their bodies wrong?

The issue with empathy is

The issue with empathy is that we want to choose who we empathize with and who we don't. And sadly ,we empathize best with those closest in relation to our waist size. (have I pissed you off yet?)

And for the record, I do care about what people put into their bodies. Not for superficial reasons, for health reasons. Our bodies weren't made to consume the amount of food we do, and the types of food we consume. We're not built to carry a large amount of weight (we've just evolved to cope). If I can point out my experiences to still eat right on a tight budget, and that there are resources to help,then I will. The same way you feel the need to base you opinion. I don't blame 100% of a person's weight on that person alone, society and resources available has a lot to do with it. But even with resources available, some people just don't care to do anything about it. And if they don't,so be it. But, if they're going to share their anger on social media, well then I will comment.

I was never over weight, but I was always ridiculed as a child for being "sickly thin", I had rumors spread about me and various eating disorders, teachers offering me lunch money and people commenting on my physical appearance. I hated my body, I had body issues. We as women ALL have self image problems. But thin women don't get a voice, because why? it is more socially acceptable? because fat people carry all the slack? God forbid I share these stories with friends, they mock my experiences because it can never come close to what an overweight woman can experience. That's bull shit, bullying occurs no matter your shape and size. I hated my body and I hated myself. It took me a long time to accept my body, and here we are with blogs about women arguing that fat women feel the wrath of society more than thin women do, we are all struggling to be accepted. Accepting of ourselves.

Even though I think she is

Even though I think she is going about this the wrong way I understand where she is coming from. I hear the phrase "Real women have curves" constantly nowadays... I'm 5'2 and 95 pounds and I could eat my weight in chocolate cake everyday and never gain a pound. It's just the way my body is. But now because I don't have curves i'm not a real woman? People constantly call me anorexic, disgustingly skinny. a skeleton & they comment on my eating habits like theres no tomorrow.

I think in the backlash of the media pressure to be skinny, instead of pushing acceptance for all women & all body types. there has been the pressure to accept heavy girls and hate on the skinny ones (even though I have never judged anyone else by there body, I get the hate anyways).

I like to go the gym to be healthy and gain muscle because I am very active in sports but if I mention it to anyone , they look at me like i'm crazy & proclaim in loud voices "WHY would you even need to workout?" And then I have to deal with the concerned looks and questions about whether or not i'm anorexic.

Just trying to say everyones body should be loved and accepted!

Just a suggestion...

It’s conceivable that Ms. Delizia’s book could meaningfully contribute to the discourse on women, size, and perceptions of scrutiny… if she were willing to do one critical thing prior to putting pen to paper: specifically, spend some time being fat. Significant time. I’m not talking about donning a fat suit for a trip to the mall, afternoon talk-show host style. I’m talking six months minimum, maybe a year. Regardless, a period of time long enough to put her experience as a “disadvantaged fit person” in context and allow for a basis of comparison.

As a formerly overweight/obese woman and a personal trainer specializing in overweight and obese women, it was never my experience that being large allowed me access to a special “sisterhood of acceptance,” nor have I heard a single client report feeling this way. I’ve certainly never had a client quit because she was getting “too fit to fit in.” Particularly striking, in response to Ms. Delizia’s comments, I specifically never felt that my larger-sized self was ever perceived to be automatically smarter than thin women, particularly during law school when our trial advocacy professors would exclaim over and over, “Juries don’t trust fat lawyers! If you can’t lose the weight before you take the bar, plan on a career writing contracts!” I’m guessing she’s also never heard that “fat girls are easy,” since they are so “desperate” for male attention. I could go on, but suffice to say, I find her commentary bizarre.

As Bitch correctly points out, what Ms. Delizia fails to understand is that she isn’t being disadvantaged on account of her fitness, let alone discriminated against. She is simply experiencing the life of any woman not locked in a closet or castle. Clearly, it is the position of our society that merely by taking up space on the sidewalk, a woman becomes a de-facto street performer and, therefore, fair game for both comment and criticism. Perhaps because my adult body weight has swung by a margin of 100 pounds, this concept is not foreign to me. Both men and women have always felt free to comment on my body, regardless of what it weighed. This is, however, a reality that I struggle to prepare my clients for. Some of them come to me erroneously believing that people will be “nicer” to them once they have lost weight, but the majority believe once they reach an “average” weight they will magically become anonymous and attract no attention at all. Many times, they find the level of scrutiny they face increases as they lose weight and others feel free to comment on the changes in their bodies. More than once, this has stopped a client’s progress in it’s tracks – NOT because they are losing membership in the revered club of honored and respected fat people, but because sometimes the painful scrutiny you know is less scary than the painful scrutiny you don’t.

Should Ms. Delizia spend some time in the world of fat female America, I believe one of the things she would discover is that the frequency of her “mistreatment” as a fit person bears no resemblance to what she would confront as a fat one. She would also discover that as “hostile” as the gym is to her now, with all those turning heads and appreciative or jealous stares, it would be a place she could scarcely endure were she obese. Sure, I’ve had my moments in the gym as a trainer and fit woman. The catty women who whisper, just loud enough for me to hear, how “gross” the veins in my arms look when I lift. The old men who walk clear across the gym to tell me how “disgusting” my muscular body is to them. On good days, I have gotten adept at saying with a smile, “what I look like is none of your business.” On bad days, it still hurts to be told I’m “gross,” regardless of the reason. Still, these occasional insults can’t hold a candle to the experiences I had when I was larger. I didn’t go to the gym back then because no one there looked like me. When I did go, conversation stopped when I walked in. Trainers of both genders made a spectacle of me, adding insult to injury. Women’s “fitness” magazines were similarly antagonistic, in part for the same reason (I never saw anyone in them who looked like I did), but also in part because the workouts they contained didn’t seem to work for my body or make a difference in my weight.

Today I know why. Not only have we have erected a single, universal standard of beauty, we both punish women who fail to meet that standard AND we lie to them about how to get there (or get closer, should they choose to do so). The “fitness” industry makes billions of dollars each year continuing to peddle what exercise scientists know simply doesn’t work. Popular women’s “fitness” magazines fill their pages with “cardio” routines, articles about “cutting calories,” and layouts by the dozen depicting fitness models “working out” with 6 pound pink dumbbells. And it is all nonsense. I tell my clients routinely, “Pick up a men’s fitness magazine, get science. Pick up the female equivalent, get crap.” Magazine publishers and some of my colleagues tell me that women “aren’t ready to hear” what works – that these “female friendly” and “accessible” workouts are better than nothing. I suspect their motives are actually more nefarious. Maybe, just maybe, if we told women what works, they wouldn’t need to keep buying magazines (let alone magic pills, shake weights, pink dumbbells, or Zumba classes).

Ms. Delizia appears to be young. She isn’t old enough to remember when cutting calories and endless aerobics were supposed to make you “thin.” She isn’t old enough to have to manage shifting estrogen levels. She certainly doesn’t appear to be intimidated by the weight room. My clients don’t have this information, they do suffer from hormone imbalance, and they are scared to death to navigate the alpha-male baffoons and fit women who surround the dumbbell rack and cable jungle. This is part of the reason they work out with me in the medical clinic where I run my practice. The other reason, of course, is that I’ve been where they’re at and I know what it takes to make a change.

Instead of trying to save “just one little girl” from the horrors of having to get fat to fit in, Ms. Delizia should try sharing her knowledge and love of fitness with girls in public schools where gym class budgets have dried up and recess is spent indoors. She could also try speaking to them about the distinction between being “thin” and being “fit,” why the number on the scale is a crappy indicator of either/both, and the importance of having your own standard of beauty, not to judge other people by but in order to better love yourself. In short, she should try speaking truth to fitness. Being fit isn’t what’s difficult. Getting fit can be. In the mean time, I will continue to run my mouth and lift heavy. Both seem a better use of my energy than starting an awareness campaign about how hard it is to buy jeans when each thigh is as big around as your waist, or why public indoor spaces should be heated to 72 degrees to accommodate those of us with abnormally low body fat… the absurdity.

Signed, the Siren of Strength.

While obviously this persons

While obviously this persons project and ideas are quite ridiculous (um case in point "fired , assaulted, or arrested for a hate crime."...for being fit/skinny)...I think she may actually feel as though she experiences discrimination. As a very skinny person who likes to work out and has food limitations due to health issues, I experience a lot rude comments and negativity for working out or being the size I am. Things like "girl you don't need to work out", "why don't you just get the're skinny enough", you need to eat more, that's not enough food, that's all you're getting?, gotta put some meat on those bones. Maybe stranger than the criticisms, I get compliments on my skinniness as though it's as simple as skinny =attractive (um thank you I know I'm skinny? but I can't even say that in response because then I will seem arrogant for knowing that I am skinny because skinny = attractive so considering myself skinny is like considering myself attractive and that's just conceited in this world)...Skinny hating is a thing, which surprises me since many of Americas icons are photoshopped to look as skinny as I am, or actually are as skinny as I am. Anyway, I get where she's coming from but obviously she's gone too far with it and missed the big picture about what her experiences are saying about America and female body pressures and expectations.

This chick needs to get over herself.

This chick needs to get over herself.

For one, the chick in the picture is not that hot, even with what she deems her "hot bod."

And her Facebookk fan page is a true homage to her ego, which proves she's worked harder for the tag "asshole" than her "butt" she's so proud of (too bad she can't work on that face).

This woman reads like someone who is jealous that some overweight women aren't hiding and she's not the center of attention. Too bad, I wonder if it was too many hugs or not enough as a child?

Perhaps the only thing as sad as her, is her group of online enablers, who clamour over her page like a bunch of people who can't wait to be just as big an asshole as her.

This is what happens when the Internet makes stupid people minor celebrities, and proof that it is way too damned easy to make a "book."


Your book would be so interesting
"Get over it" by anonymous
Would it follow "know your place" and "deal with it"

I stand with her 100%

She is 100% correct and anyone that says she isn't is just a fat jealous pig.

I've been thin my whole life and have been bullied my whole life. Who am I bullied by --- well I'll give you a hint it's never been a man and it's never been a thin female.

You do the math.

In the last couple of years I've started lifting weights and really going all organic and high protein in my diet. When I step on the beach in a bikini I KNOCK IT OUT OF THE PARK. I could rival any girl in Sports Illustrated or Victoria Secret. I have TMZ following me around.

Men love me. Women hate me.

This women deserves to be praised for her efforts to call awareness to what these fat vile mongrels who call themselves women are doing to society. NO ONE WANTS TO HAVE SEX WITH AN OVERWEIGHT BLOB.

Having TMZ following you

Having TMZ following you around is something you're bragging about?

I found this whilst googling

I found this whilst googling "fat shaming" due to the recent study about that subject. I would like Princess in the photo to know that gloating isn't very becoming, in fact it is a sign that she hasn't won many battles in her life, poor thing.

Being a fat person who only doesn't like the gym when certain types are there (the ones who growl "GORDISSIMA!" at me when I am merely trying to put my yoga may away after CX Worx). Such wonderful and beautiful people! I am trying to be gracious even though they are not.

Anyone else wanna slap her teeth out?

This work of yours is an

This work of yours is an magnificent piece. I really think that most of the work you've done has been great but this time, this work if even more great. That's why I called it 'magnificent'. And yes, this is! I am really pleased to be reading this <a href=""></a>

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