Sex and the Fat Girl: Basking in the Afterglow

Tasha Fierce
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Tasha Fierce is a writer living in the occupied Tongva territory known as Los Angeles. You can follow them on Twitter at @tashajfierce and read more of their work on their website.

This column has come to an end! I hope what we discussed helped you learn to love yourself a bit more. And, of course, I hope it made you think a bit and challenge assumptions about fat sexuality and societal beauty standards. My goal is to enlighten and deconstruct, to help fat women empower themselves and take their body image and sexuality into their own hands. So if anyone started on the road to self-acceptance because of this column, I’m happy.

I feel like talking loudly about fat sexuality is important, and I hope you’re interested in keeping this dialogue going, whether with other fat women or just with yourself. I want to work towards changing societal beauty standards and then eliminate them. I want society, or at the very least the FA community, to recognize that choosing to be fat is as valid as the claims of innocence. I want fat women everywhere to enjoy their bodies and learn what pleasure they can bring. I want to untangle fat from health. And I want you to do it with me.

It’s doubtful that this column alone will be revolutionary, of course. It’s just one voice. But if all fat people, not just women, start singing the same song, I think we can move mountains. And not just mountains of flesh. With time and persistence, eventually the revolution will come, whether or not it’s in my lifetime. But I hope I get to see the day when being fat is just as valid as being thin, when fat sex is not met with “eww, keep it indoors,” and when our paragons of beauty come in all shapes and sizes.

If you’re interested in reading more, you can check out my blog, also called Sex and the Fat Girl. You can find me on Twitter as @thefiercestgirl and on Facebook. Also, if you’d like you can check out the archives of my old blog at Red Vinyl Shoes.

Keep in touch, and thank you for supporting this column. Much love.

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4 Comments Have Been Posted


i've loved both your series on bitch! i hope you'll be back and will be reading your blog in the mean time. Thank you Tasha.


What you did with this series was great and I am so glad that you did it. There seems to be a lack of these types of important discussions and that is worrisome. I've learned a lot from your commentary and am glad that Bitch gave you the space to make it. Thanks again!

Thank you so much for all

Thank you so much for all your wonderful advice and insights, Tasha! I love the fat positive focus of your writing and find it extremely inspiring. I also love that while you maintain that focus, what you talk about can really apply to everyone especially women. Reading your writing really made me think about how our thin-obsessed, impossible-body-image-idolizing culture really makes all women regardless of their size feel undesirable, "too fat," or unbeautiful at least sometimes and how necessary it is for us to change this image within ourselves and in society. I really wish everyone would read your blog because I just love that it applies to everyone in this way while focusing on fat women and recognizing that changing these unhealthy body images isn't just about making thin women feel good in their skins, it's about everyone feeling good in their skin (and their fat!). I really want everyone reading your blog and everyone singing that song regardless of their size or gender! It's necessary and the sooner people wake up to that the better!

Thank you

Thank you for your wonderful insights and honest realities about living and loving life as a full-bodied and vivacious woman. I am not as confident or comfortable with my size, but you truly inspired me to be more accepting of myself as a fat woman.

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